Tree a Day #14: OM

I've been having so many good talks with friends...!! This time it's Biggers. I told him about the heaviness I'd been feeling from living abroad & being without my friends. Friends bring out different parts of you, and to be without those people... well, you find yourself being just you, as in your core you, plain & simple. While it's good to be yourself, it's exhausting, tiring, and frightening. KB likened to sleep. You need sleep to take a break from living (and I also think of that episode of Star Trek where the crew goes crazy because they can't have REM sleep). I miss my friends to take a break from being me. But at the same time, it's making me face a lot of issues and confront who I am. Anyway, at the end of all this talk of feelings, heaviness and changes, KB said:

I don't imagine that we'll be having the same conversations a few months down the road. Because I believe you'll  soften & lighten the heaviness plaguing you right now. But if we are having the same or a similar conversation it's ok.

Gah. "It's ok." Just hearing that, being reminded of that... I felt so much better. I feel like we often put too much pressure on ourselves to be a certain way, by a certain time. When I work, I like having deadlines because I mold my schedule around meeting them. But I guess you can't approach life like that. You work toward deadlines. You live in the present.

Tree a Day #13

do be do be doooo

Progress Report #3: Beagle

gotcha!

the oooold hidden eyes trick!

Progress Report #2: Beagle

Mmmm... he's so cute. I'm having fun with the different textures & patterns, all blending together to get those beagle browns. It's been tough finding the time in between freelancing, but I'm managing. Sewing keeps me happy & my mind at ease.

Breakfast!

I ate a bunch of cookies yesterday and it made my tummy so sick. I haven't been eating processed foods recently (unless you count the occasional hopia or polvoron). So, to counter it, I had the most delicious papaya for breakfast. I just had to share how pretty it was (was because it's all gone now!). It cost 35 cents too! Take that USA! lol

Tree a Day #12

it's true. i have nothing but love for my wacom.

(just playing with the brush pressures on the pen)

Cultural Differences

I haven't experienced such intense racism in a very long time...

At the pool this morning there were mostly Europeans swimming laps in their very straight lines, very organized, very serious. Then the locals (mostly kids) started to trickle in, jumping into the pool, swimming wherever they wanted. I was rather amused by the difference in pool etiquette. For the most part everyone stayed out of each other's way. I got out and sat down by the Euros. A gent from their entourage came out of the pool screaming in anger. I can't understand French, but I did understand: brown fuckin' monkey, ignorant ape, yellow n-word, and my favorite, white power. And to add to the scene, he had a filipino wife (about my age.. he's probably in his early 40s) and a toddler. She just stood there smiling & feigning ignorance. I mean, if I could understand him, she sure as hell could too. Part of me wanted to speak up and say, Could you calm down please? Your words are offensive.... or even, Hey! if you don't like it here... leave!

I'm not really angry. Just shocked that people can be so angry & ignorant. Cultural differences. If you live in another country, you can certainly be frustrated & complain all you want about how it's different than your own customs but it's still down to you: assimilate, compromise or avoid. I guess it's an example of choosing unhappiness. 

I can say one thing though about the people here in the Philippines... they do know how to enjoy life & be happy with what little they have. Just as Thailand is the land of smiles, I can wholeheartedly vouch for the Pinas as the land of laughter.